The Opinionator: Nintendo DS Double Kill
And kill it will be. Both of the games I will be reviewing sucked so much ass I barely played them before saying, “Fuck it that’ll do,” and throwing the games in my trade in pile.
Now you may be thinking “But Opinionator you god like figure, what games are those that you speak so harshly about? Without you, we won’t be able to find out A. That we are currently unbiased and about to find out our opinion or B. Why our opinion is wrong.”
Well my preamble that is usually 1 paragraph turned into 2 but whatever. Now I will reveal the games I will be destroying with words in this quick little review. Oh yeah did I forget to mention that? This double review is going to be short…hopefully…
Okay so no more distracting myself let’s talk shittiness. Scribblenauts and Insecticide for the Nintendo DS are 2 of the worst games I have played in awhile. While Scribblenauts isn’t too terrible but I still really didn’t like it, Insecticide is one of the worst games I have played in a long time. However, it isn’t the worst game I have ever played; we will get to those eventually.
Now I’m going to jut back out of the review quickly and say these will be short because I didn’t play much and therefore don’t have much to criticise
Ok so Scribblenauts. I started up the game and started running around until I realised it was like a damn demo so I pressed start. Then I got into a whole host of fucking tutorials that went on for ages. The idea of this game I find really interesting and a cool idea…if they hadn’t just flipped the idea for their last game. 5th cell media created Scribblenauts as well as Drawn to Life. In Drawn to Life, you had to draw everything that you want because the idea was that way. In Scribblenauts, the creators drew every object on earth. Well that’s not true you can’t have anything phallic or racially insensitive. The reason I didn’t like this game is because I thought you got to draw it with scribble in the title but no, you have to write it out for it to be created.
So this next game, Insecticide, I bought for $10 at a Giant Tiger store in my area one day and only played it a few days ago or about 2 weeks after the purchase. Now this game sucks so bad because of how bad the developers fucked it up. This game is brought to us by GameCock games and the company title alone should tell you all you need to know. Now sometimes I am hard to understand on whether I like a game or not so, I will be clear here. THIS. GAME. SUCKS. COCKS. There that’s all I really need to say. But no, I will go on. I was playing it on a 3DS but it works the same with a D-Pad. If you want to move to your left, first you have to rotate the camera to the left then run forward. You can’t move side to side. This is bullshit. This game is honestly one of the worst DS games I have seen and that is saying something considering I have played Electroplankton (coming soon).
So yeah, this review is done now because I just don’t want to continue talking about these games.